I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
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