Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize