My hand turned me down
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
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