Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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