Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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