Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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