her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
