She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Randomize