New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
high people should be assigned attendants
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize