i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
everyone is single if you try hard enough
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Randomize