I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
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