a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
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