He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
