arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
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