I wanna passion pit in your ass
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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