Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Randomize
