Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
