some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize