Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
