how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
30 People Reveal The Moment They Realized: ‘Oh Sh*t, I’m An A**hole’
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
30 Tiny Celebrity Tattoos You’ll Want To Run Out And Copy ASAP
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with