It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
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