? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize
