Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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