so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
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If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
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Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
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