i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
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I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
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I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
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