are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Randomize
