just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
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You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
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Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.