"it" just moved
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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