Three words: puerto rican gang bang
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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