it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
