you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
