i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
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