quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
