So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize
