They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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