Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Someone signed my nipple.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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