Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
