The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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