After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Randomize