And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
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