id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize