Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
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