I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Randomize