she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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