Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
