I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Brb crying the tears of my youth
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
