I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
