i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
