You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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