I'm going to jail i love you
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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